Anyone is welcome to grab my crotch, I don’t require dinner and a movie, just ask me. Is that asking too much? You wanna grab my crotch, please ask. Does that seem like a crazy person to you?

Anyone is welcome to grab my crotch, I don\’t require dinner and a movie, just ask me. Is that asking too much? You wanna grab my crotch, please ask. Does that seem like a crazy person to you?
Penn & Teller | ROAD PENN

Thoroughly Burney Saturday

I’ve been incredibly productive today will things burn-related and even those not. I got up and hit the Goodwill 50% off sale at 8 AM this morning and came home with $19.80 of treasure!

A basket for my rear-mounted bike rack (since front-mounted basket 1.0 lost the fight with the RV I bumped into).

I found some orange, light blue, and dark blue fun fur. The orange is likely going to become a camp chair seat covering while the blues may very well end up furring my bike as they would coordinate fantastically with the blue LED string lights I picked up at last week that I’d intended for the bike anyway.

And some 4″ iridescent gold foil ribbon that I have no idea what I’m going to do with, but it was calling my name. I have faith the universe will show  me the way.

I also picked up some more table cloths and bed sheets for lungis.

From left to right: white cotton with gold thread grid pattern, some green-red-orange-yellow mod square pattern, rainbow stripes, and the tribal orange fabric that I bought about a month ago at another 50% off sale.

I also picked up a second red ass pillow to have as a backup or for a gift to a fellow burner on the playa. I came home with a bruised tail bone and I’m planning to prevent that if at all possible in 2011 by strapping additional cushioning to my bike saddle.

I punched holes in the four corners, and I was able to add grommets to the smaller pillow to prevent the rope from expanding the hole once it’s affixed to the bike.

The Man Burns In 308 Days )'(

Burning Man Is…

(compiled from this thread on ePlaya)

  • Mad Max meets Dr. Seuss in Las Vegas.
  • Timothy Leary vs. Dune
  • Mad Peter Max
  • Just a fucking dusty camping trip in the desert.
  • The Freak Olympics
  • This huge weird art festival out in the gnarly desert where you bring EVERYTHING and take EVERYTHING back with you and it’s pretty much an acid trip without the acid but with all the sweat.
  • A week long leave-no-trace Crash Worship show.
  • It’s like living in a cartoon for a week.
  • A beach party that went off the rails.
  • Not really kids playing “house”, more like adults playing “city”.
  • A modern tribal Dali-esque neo-apocalypic flaming dust storm sausage factory techno-carnival on L.S.D.; in space.
  • The most fun I know how to have legally.
  • A giant amusement park where all the rides, shows, entertainments and other attractions are invented, built and operated by the visitors themselves.
  • The biggest, loudest, dustiest, week long world of mind blowing individual creativity you will ever be a part of.
  • cockshirt convention
  • It’s like camping on Mars.
  • 4th of July bbq Halloween rave electric light parade on acid art party pagan spring break mad max hippy freak out in the desert where we burn things and ride bikes.
  • Mad Max meets Mardis Gras.
  • A place where radical expression is at first gleefully contagious, but then just another norm.
  • It was ten times harder than I thought it would be, and a hundred times more worth it.
  • Halloween, Christmas and your first blowjob all rolled into one.
  • A magnificent flower on the manure pile!
  • The Merry Pranksters find unlimited funds and invite you to help them throw a huge party.
  • It’s like the soft-porn circus of the apocalypse!
  • Organized chaos with a touch of randomness.
  • Whatever question you can ask me about Burning Man, the answer is ‘yes’.
  • The only opportunity you’ll ever get to fall down Lewis Carroll’s rabbit hole – but the hole is actually a large expanse of flat Earth.
  • The world’s most dangerous gestalt therapy session.
  • No explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time and the world. Whatever it meant.
  • S.N.A.F.U.
  • Like going to Chuck E. Cheese except the whole place is filled with old, naked, fat men and you can’t find
    a towel to hide your erection while your mom is yelling at you to take out the trash.
  • Disney Land on acid, except all the participants are Mickey Mouse. Except all the participants are really Goofy. On acid. Playing with fire.
  • Mad Max meets Pippi Longstockings (and gets her pregnant).
  • Mad Max meets Pippi Longstocking and she gets him pregnant.
  • The world’s biggest blinky toy.
  • A paranormal hoedown.
  • It’s that big party scene in Cecil B. DeMille’s The Ten Commandments that the Israelites were enjoying while Moses was up in the mountains getting the 10 Commandments.
  • A nice place to show off a hat.
  • Organized mayhem.
  • Rainbow Festival for Bad People.
  • PHYSICAL DREAM
  • New Year’s Eve + Mardi Gras + 50th Birthday Party + Summer Camp + Your Best Dream Ever + Camping Trip + Sleepover Party + Grateful Dead Tour + Outdoor Museum + Rave + Mad Max + Surprise Party + Potluck + Disneyland Electric Light Parade + Carnivale + Pirates = Burning Man
  • Mad Max meets the Erotic Exotic Ball, meets the Star Wars bar scene, at Woodstock, on the Moon.
  • The largest temporary synchronicity accelerator in the world.
  • It’s the darndest thing.
  • It’s like Comic Con, The Mermaid Parade, New Years and your birthday happen for a week on the moon. Also, at Burning Man, no matter what is happening, a rave is also happening. Also, the whole place always feels to me like what would happen if Salvador Dali drew Spongebob Squarepants.
  • Burning Man is where normal goes to die.
  • Adults having fun so kids will want to grow up.
  • The greatest thing I never could have imagined.
  • There’s nothing on the playa except dust, wind, and dreams.

Intoxicating Freedom

Last night I was reading the final chapters of The Golden City last night and found it’s indictment of modern society particularly on target, to wit:

When people believe they have no real power, their only choice becomes what to consume. Our society’s constant emphasis on buying things has nothing to do with the loss of morality. We feel powerful when we buy something, so we are easily manipulated to buy more.

Freedom is the ability to think, act, and express our views. In a free society, our rights are respected as long as they don’t harm others. A political system that allows freedom has validity no matter how you view mankind.

– Gabriel Corrigan in The Golden City, a novel by John Twelve Hawks

Then it occurred to me that the freedom one experiences at Burning Man is precisely that non-consumer driven variety of real personal autonomy. Aaron Muszalski (a.k.a. sfslim) also speaks of the powerful agency that participants find on the playa in this PirateCatRadio podcast. I personally felt this freedom to be intoxicating, and I can easily imagine that others do as well.

Watchless

Ever since I returned from Burning Man, I have felt a gut twinge whenever I’ve put on my wrist watch. Somehow wearing the arm band has felt more like a shackle to the default world rather than a useful tool in a convenient package. Weekends have been largely watch-free, but today is the first work day that I’ve deliberately left the wrist watch at home. Yes, I have a clock on my person in the form of the modern day pocket watch (i.e., mobile phone), but I’m no longer encumbered by the physical band around my arm. The feeling is strangely liberating.