A tale from the death zone

So it’s Christmas Eve and I’ve got the turkey in the brine and a pot roast in the slow cooker. Those are in the plus column. In the other column, I’ve yet to wrap the gifts for my wife and my youngest is running around the house butt nekkid. Back in the plus column, it’s snowing again – putting a top coat on the several inches still left on the ground from the storm on Wednesday.

I went to Wal*Mart last night, and I came out alive. Granted, I didn’t go directly into the death zone (toy department) but only skirted the perimeter as my mission did not call for that level of hazard. I admit, I went to Wal*Mart on Christmas Eve Eve just so I could say that I did and made it through in one piece. Cheap thrills.

I think it’s time to open the wine.

At least I’m not a Yankee

What American accent do you have?

Your Result: The Midland

“You have a Midland accent” is just another way of saying “you don’t have an accent.” You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.

What American accent do you have?
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Tough Love vs. Spanking

I got this as a e-mail forward, which would usually mean I’d just delete it and move on, but this was too funny not to share.

Tough Love vs. Spanking ~ (a psychological conundrum)

Most of America’s populace think it improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of “those moments.”

One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk.

They usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together.

I’ve included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique.

Sincerely,
A Friend

tough love