So I was in the bathroom at work today, and crawling on the back of the commode was a large cockroach. As I was voiding, I watched the bugger crawl into the crevasse between the back of the commode and the wall. “Ah ha,” I thought, “now I know where you sleep!” But then the thought occurred to me, “oh shit, now I'll never be able to sit on the commode again without fear of having the dirty bastard start to crawl up my backside.” That could get messy, if you know what I mean.